Uuh, today sucked (up until Emily and Alexander came over, of course). I've been so tired this week and working really hard on stuff... Monday I worked all morning and through lunch on an illustration project that actually turned out really nicely (inspired by the catcher in the rye), then after school I had my first shift which was a bit overwhelming. When I got home from work, I worked more on my illustration project till about 12:30 when I went to sleep. Tuesday I spent all morning, lunch, and period 4 in the dark room printing photos for the last time this year. I spent period 5 in the library working on period 4 homework and english homework. After that I got my hair done and I read my new isp book while the dye was setting in. Then I got home and finished another part of my illustration project, then went to bed. Today I worked on illustration all morning and lunch. I was super busy so I didn't really even get to talk to Michelle much, then I went to my fourth period class where no one talked to me. Korrin wasn't there (as usual) and kristyn who occasionally talks to me dropped the class. dat makes me sad. So all that's left is Matt but we didn't really talk either. Then I went to English and worked on period 4 work while everyone else socialized then watched a movie. I got really sad when I got home because I'm so lonely and I don't know how to fix it and it sucks. Prozac isn't doing shit for me.

BUT THEN EMILY AND ALEXANDER CAME OVER AND IT WAS THE HAPPIEST I'VE BEEN ALL MONTH I THINK. I seriously fucking love them, they are my favourite friends above and beyond any others. They're just perfect, I don't even know. We have so much fun together and no one makes me laugh harder and just uuuggh I love them! I've realized I usually get post emily and alexander depression after they leave me or I leave them though. I get sad and lonely again and it sucks. Now it's 12:30 and I'm tired and I should finish the final part of my illustration project but I'm fucking tired and I need sleep because I work tomorrow after school. I don't like working right after school, I wish there was time for me to come home for like an hour first, so I wouldn't have to bring my school crap to work and get changed in the smushy stall because I won't change in the changeroom part and have to worry about my damn nose ring and just ugh. All the stress. I can't wait for Friday, I'm gonna go to bed at 8 or something, I don't even know. It'd be nice if I just didn't work at all this weekend but I doubt that will happen. In 2 weeks I have another doctor's appointment and I really hope she gives me a higher dosage because I really want to be happy and I can't achieve that on my own, I just can't. Goodnight.